Wonder - fully creative

No doubt Wonder Woman had to get creative in her crime fighting adventures.  To paraphrase, there are many ways to catch a thief, and Wonder Woman used her incredible powers to solve all sort of problems.

While I'm no crime fighter (except for brotherly crimes that take place in our living room), at last, after 41 years of trying, I'm recognizing that I am creative. 

When I was in Grade 2, we had an Easter school project.  We had to make a bunny with movable parts, using paper fasteners.  I diligently worked on that project and proudly brought it to school.  I distinctly remember that day.  I stood up to show my bunny.  The teacher laughed at it.  As did my classmates.  I was devastated.

That moment permanently etched itself in my mind, and 35 years later, I still think of it from time to time.  And I truly believe that that particular moment squashed years of confident creativity.  I described that moment at a Mom's club meeting one day, and it brought me to tears.

I have never considered myself to be artistic or creative.  I had no confidence in my drawing, coloring, or general art related abilities.  And I think it was all because of that awful second grade event.  Even at grad school in an urban design class, I was terrified and embarrassed to share my simple drawing.  All done using rulers and easy lines.

But recently, I've been seeing things in a different light. 

I've done a lot of scrapbooking since I had children (though I am years behind!).  I love the feel of paper in my hands and the designs I can create with simple cutting and pasting.  My early attempts were pretty rudimentary, but my skills have evolved over the years.  And looking through my albums, if I do say so myself, my pages are not bad at all!

And I'm now embracing another love of mine - cake decorating.  I've learned that decorating a cake is really a set of relatively simple steps. But when put together, they produce an incredible result.  Just like the brush strokes of a painter.  When taken individually, they are simple marks on a canvas.  But put together, there is a beautiful picture.

I'm finally realizing that perhaps I'm creative after all, and that perhaps I even have talent. 

I made a sandcastle cake last week for a Bar Mitzvah with an "underwater" theme.  For almost 190 people!  And I loved EVERY minute of it.   Without question.  And the pride when I delivered it was something I hadn't felt in a long time.  

I found something that I was passionate about.
That brought joy to almost 200 people.
And I was creative.

I can't believe that it has taken me over 3 decades to reach a point where I am truly proud of something I have created.  I suspect that here are many others out there who feel the same way.  We have little confidence in our abilities to create a masterpiece.

But all it takes is a few simple steps.  Put them together, and something beautiful can appear.

Rediscovering My Inner Wonder Woman

When I was a school girl in Grade 2, one of my favorite games to play at recess was Wonder Woman.  I would put on my bullet proof bracelets, spin my Lasso of Truth and climb aboard my invisible jet, along with the other 8 year old girls dreaming of becoming Wonder Woman.  We were invincible, bringing truth, justice and feminine power to the playground. 

Fast forward to the end of high school.  About to venture into the next phase of my life - university - I was ready to seize what was in front of me.  Young adulthood, knowledge and once again, truth.  Finding my passions, determining my dreams, becoming the invincible woman - indeed the Wonder Woman - that I was destined to be. The end of Grad School brought the same feelings, now ones of mature independence, professionalism, and again truth as I began my career in Corporate America.  A future that was incredibly bright was before me.  I felt like Wonder Woman all over again.  That little child was playing her favorite superhero once more, just in a different context.  But the underlying values and dreams were there.

And now, 15 years later, I feel like my Wonder Woman is disappearing.

I left my corporate office behind 10 years ago after the birth of my first son and have been at home ever since.  Now with three boys, a husband, dog, cat, and endless loads of laundry and messes to clean up,

I feel like I am losing my inner Wonder Woman.  She has been lurking there in a dark corner for most of my motherhood years, and I feel that she is fading away.  

And I am on a quest to rediscover her.

Motherhood is truly one of the most difficult jobs there is.  We give 100 per cent of ourselves to our children.  I love my boys, they are the center of my world.  But in that world, I sometimes forget that I am there too!

Their passions have become my passions.  

My meals are often their leftovers. 

My hobbies involve writing about my children.   

My dreams have morphed into dreams for my children. 

(Plus my body has been forever changed by three pregnancies and 6 years of breastfeeding.  Changes that only a breast lift and tummy tuck will fix.  Can the real Wonder Woman mend that??)

Somewhere in my days and nights of mothering I have forgotten my own dreams, my own passions and my inner core.  I know those things - the essence of my Wonder Woman - are still there, they have just been buried under the avalanche of motherhood.

So now my search begins.  I'm giving myself four months of time devoted to this.  Time to think about my inner core and what makes me, me.  Time to rediscover my passions, convictions and hobbies.  I've put a time frame on it because otherwise I know mommy-hood will take over - my needs will fade away again unless I give myself a specific goal to work towards. 

Have you lost your inner Wonder Woman as well?  Is she lurking in the shadows? 

Or is she up front and glorious for the world to see?  If she is, please share how you found her - or never lost her! 

If you want - and need - to look for her, let's do our searching together. Let's fill our world with Wonder Women - women of confidence, beauty, strength, and truth.  Truth to ourselves and those we love most.

The re-discovery begins tomorrow, Wednesday, March 2. Here on the half full pink martini, I'm declaring Wednesdays to be "Wonder Woman Wednesdays" when we can board our invisible jets, wear our bullet proof bracelets and lasso some truth.  Are you ready to fly?

If you haven't got anything nice to say...

I check my Yahoo! news page first thing in the morning to see what is going on in the world.  Plus sometimes there are odd "human interest" stories that provide a break from the normal doom and gloom of the news.

Lately I've started reading the comments on some of the stories. 

And I think I'm going to stop reading those comments.

I can't believe the rampant rudeness!  It seems the anonymity of the internet has given free licence to people to say what ever they want.  No matter how uncivilized, childish, mean spirited and insulting their comments may be.  Whether it be a political, social, current events news item or just an interesting story, people are writing horrible things.

Recently I read a tragic story about a family in Canada that was killed in a car accident. 
Random comment: Who cares?  They are Canadians.

Stories about bullying, people dying in fires, horrible illnesses...the hurtful messages that people leave astound me.  There seems to be no compassion.  I really don't understand why, when the subject of the story has faced unspeakable tragedy, comments have to add even more hurt and hate.

As a parent, one of my jobs is to teach my children respect for their fellow human beings.  And kindness.  And compassion.  And understanding.  And tolerance.  And that job gets harder and harder every day because we are surrounded by hatred and intolerance.
There has been a lot of talk about this in politics recently.  And it doesn't matter what side of the political aisle you are on - it comes from both sides.  How can I teach my children respect and kindness when our politicians and national commentators are calling each other Hitler, putting gun sights on their opponents and telling their supporters to reload?  How can we ever expect to raise children into decent adults when our leaders can not themselves set a good example?

The recent horrific events in Arizona have certainly given us pause as a nation.  However, I fear that this will be short lived.  Our memories do not seem to last very long.  Attention moves on to the likes of the Jersey Shore  - where not much is said in kindness (or sobriety) either.

We teach our children that if you haven't got anything nice to say, then don't say anything.  Imagine if our media, politicians and commenters followed that ancient rule of being nice.  The world would be a much quieter place.